dodgerroger

Anyway, I met Mary Jarvis at dinner Friday night and I like her a lot. Even if she were not a practicing physical immortal and veritable fountain of yoga knowledge I would still like her. She’s the kind of person it would be cool to hang around for a month or six and hear her tell all her stories. It was cool to talk about random things like baseball although the conversation eventually turned towards yoga. She said it took her many years before she really understood why she did yoga. I’m still trying to understand myself.

I was basically at the studio on saturday from 8:30am to 6:30am and it was filled with yoga goodness. Even before the seminar I felt like I was at a bit of a yoga crossroads. I sort of explored the limits of over-training the first half of the year and realized that I don’t think the path of Anton or Kilian is the path for me. I listened to the ultra runner podcast with nutritionist Sunny Blend and she talks about how an ultra marathon is basically an eating contest. In the race you basically can only digest and process 200 calories per hour and if you fall behind you can’t just eat 400 calories and catch up. I feel that way about my hydration during the summer. I basically fell into such a debt that no matter how much I hydrated and juiced I couldn’t catch up.

I did the Blessed Herbs cleanse along with several people from the studio. I didn’t have any emotional breakdowns or enlightenments, I think I came out of it less crazy than before, which I think is a good thing. 

I was coming to grips with the fact that I was no longer a 7 day a week practicer (only 6 times a week, and that one day off makes a HUGE difference). Intellectually, I know that 6 days a week is healthier for me. In the past, I would go to the studio even if I was massively depleted. I started to get used to doing yoga while feeling lousy and it became normal. When my body basically said enough is enough and shut down I finally took enough time to for my body to return to normal. I don’t think it’s really necessary to define yourself as a “everyday practicer” or a “3 times a week” practicer”. I’d rather live in the moment and not dwell so much on the past or future.

But we all have an ego and I had always thought of myself as a yogi with a daily practice. Letting go of what I think I SHOULD be and accepting myself for how I am now is something I’m working on.

So, it was like a bolt of lightening when Mary said at the very beginning that when you practice, you don’t have to prove yourself to anyone. You don’t have to prove yourself to the teacher. I have come to realize that when I practice, I actually do that a lot. I feel a bit of pressure to live up to a standard and I’ve been trying to let that go. Mary saying this just crystallized this and brought it to the forefront of my consciousness (in particular, I feel pressure to prove myself in Jeff’s class. I feel like he gives so much in class that I don’t want to let him down, but I end up blowing a gasket about 40% of the time and have to sit something out.).

Another theme that Mary talked about was the importance of humility and compassion. She made all the teachers practice in the back row. She talked constantly about how worthless it is to have a perfect posture if you are not a good person. It’s obvious of course, but when someone that a lot of people respect says it, the words carry more weight. And you can tell she truly believes it.

She talked about how she practiced for a while without a mirror and really feeling the posture (I had experimented for a while with practicing without my glasses or contacts to “feel” the posture more (It made it harder to balance)).

Anyway, I think this seminar with Mary has transformed my practice. That’s a long post for the future.

Up Next:  Long-ass Notes from Mary Jarvis’s Master Class(es)/Posture Clinic.